ignoroscopes

By Tyler Mitchell – Senior Editor

 

Libra: Sept. 23-Oct. 22

Try being a good person! The next time you’re in a drive thru at Starbucks or a fast food restaurant, buy the person’s food behind you. It’ll make you feel great about yourself!

Scorpio: Oct. 23-Nov. 21

Go outside and build a snowman! And then serenade it as others look upon you, questioning your sanity…

Sagittarius: Nov. 22-Dec.21

It’s February, the month of looooove! It’s also the month of discounted chocolate sales, which you’re totally going to take advantage of!

Capricorn: Dec. 22- Jan. 19

Kelvin is literally the best Instagram filter ever. Use it on all of your pics to add an orange hue that will make all of your followers super jelly.

Aquarius: Jan. 20- Feb. 18

Congrats! You alone will revive the word “coolio!” Use it obnoxiously when in the caf! Those that remain seated at your table are your true friends.

Pisces: Feb. 19-March 20

Steer clear of Facebook this weekend. Everyone will be getting engaged. Such Debbie downers!

Aries: March 21- April 19

Color your hair hot pink to add some necessary $wag. Because, let’s be honest, you’re kind of basic.

Taurus: April 20-May 20

The Olympics will dominate your TV this weekend! In fact, you’ll be so inspired that you’ll become a professional skiier! Slopes up, bro!

Gemini: May 21-June 21

Cut back on the protein shakes, dude. We get it already, you’re swoll.

Cancer: June 22-July 22

Try the Bollywood Workout station on Pandora.

Leo: July 23-Aug. 22

Keep playing Flappy Bird. Who needs to study or socialize with others? I mean really?

Virgo: Aug. 23-Sept. 22

You are absolutely perfect. Change nothing about yourself. Just be you and never let others tell you differently!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s